Some shows that almost could have definitely made it, had they got on air, plus one or two shows that definitely could never have made it that did somehow get to air.
Daryl’s Wonderful World of Somers
Presented by Daryl Somers. Daryl presents highlights of him presented other shows, including adjectives, pulling his mock-surprised face that he originated from watching Benny Hill do it, and fawning over tin-pot US celebrities. Includes special guest, Daryl Somers.
TV’s Finest Swearing
Inc post-race swearing montage of winning jockeys on horseback following Melbourne Cup
Series about indigenous Australian detective, featuring Cameron Daddo
Frankly Horrible Movie Festival
Australian movie series
Gavin Wood’s Big Numbers
Some of the former DJ and booth announcer’s favourite lotto numbers, and booths.
The Comedy Sale
Intriguingly hopeless sketch comedy show featuring…oops sorry, it’s over, you missed it.
Trilogy of Terror
Tennis show, featuring commentary highlights from Tony Tray-bert, “Fahry” Fred Stolle and Bewdy Newk.
Richie Benaud’s Wide World of Suits
Cooking show feat. Mario Milano making different varieties of pizza while being attacked by the Von Steiger brothers, Tiger Singh and Professor Tanaka, until Spiros Arion comes to the rescue from the shower, covered in foam and water. Other shows include pasta, seafood preparation and Skull Murphy and Brute Bernard.
The Landy Factor
Hosted by Peter Landy, in the position in which he is broadcasting from
Bowling For Dollars, with Laurie Oakes
With regular special guest pin-girl Lee Lin Chin
Grouse Groins and Bonzer Bazongas
Presented by Ray Martin
Naomi Robson’s World of Soup
Election Night, with Sesame Street’s The Count
This is Your Other Life
Roller Derby Classics
hosted by David Johnston and Kerry O’Brien. Includes highlights from LA T-Birds and Ralphie Valladares, plus popular “Where Are They Now?” segment in which David and Kerry try to work out where they are now.
How to Hair
Presented by Bill Collins
Ian McFadyen’s Cluedo
This show actually existed, briefly.
Not Now, Caton
Hilarious misadventures of the one-role, one-moustache comedy-acting stylist
The Racist Cartoon Half-Hour
(inc such favourites as Hong Kong Phooey and The Amazing Chan and the Chan Clan)
All-Night Rave, with Steve Liebman
Dancing, energy drinks, sensible brown pants
Love, Australian Style
Wheel of Chickens
Poultry-based game show
All-Time Greatest Logies Moments
One-off special, 5 minutes in duration, including 3 mins of ads
The Burkhalter/Hochstetter Power Hour
What’s My Line
starring Australia’s young soap opera actors trying to remember their line
Tori Spelling acting clinic/highlights reel
Catriona Rowntree Goes Off
Maybe it is a travel show and maybe it’s not
Dateline: This Evening
with Ray Warren and Paris Hilton